National Lampoon’s Colorado Adventure
13 Jan 2007 Leave a Comment
in travel and adventure Tags: adventure, children, colorado, comedy, family, skiing, snow, travel, trip, vacation
Okay, so this blog has no philosphical, life-changing elements, but I just survived the craziest trip – I had to share! Oh, and I swear all of this actually happened!
It started Wednesday night, I was packing for our trip to Breckenridge, Colorado. I was flipping channels on the tv and came across National Lampoons Vacation. I had to watch it to get into the vacation spirit – but if only I had known the foreboding irony of watching that movie!!
We were to leave Thursday afternoon when the kids got home from school. Things started to turn sour when I realized that the $400 I had gotten out of the ATM the day before was now nowhere to be found. I searched high and low, dug in trash cans, unpacked and repacked. When Sam got home from work I was lying on the living room floor in a state of shock. I still haven’t found the money.
Then Sam shared the wonderful news that our water bill, which is normally about $30, was this month the low, low price of nearly $200. And, of course we had to pay it, or we’d have no water upon return from Colorado. We are still in a dispute with the City.
Oh, well……we put fake smiles on our faces and piled into the overstuffed van. “We’re on vacation! Let’s be happy!” So…..we finally left Leesville. Things went well on the LOOOOONG trip to Colorado. We made it to Pueblo around 9am Friday. My brother Mason and I were so excited to see snow that we drove all night. We rented a couple hotel rooms and crashed. We were all a little disappointed – we were only two hours from Breckenridge, yet we’d not seen any real snow.
Saturday morning, after the mandatory McDonald’s breakfast stop, we started on our way to Breckenridge. About 45 minutes into the drive we got our first real glimpse of the snowy mountains. Then we got excited! The snow got more and more abundant as we drove up the mountains. We got to the street leading to our cabin.
The road twisted and turned up the mountain. I rolled the window down to take a picture. That’s when we realized our brakes were burning! Sam tried to stop at the entrance to our driveway and nearly ran into Pam and Allen’s car! Uh, oh!
Our four car caravan then attempted to make it up the – oh maybe 60 degree incline up to the house. The driveway was coated in ice and none of our vehicles were making it. We tried pushing, pulling, sheer might – nothing was working. I swear, I started looking for hidden cameras!
We finally lucked out when the cabin rental agent showed up with a 4×4 and a tow cable. I know he was laughing at us low-landers. Well, problem solved – sort of – now we were stuck at the cabin! How were we gonna get around? Eventually my sister, Jen and her husband Nick showed up with their 4-wheel drive they had rented at the Denver airport. They had wisely chosen to fly to Colorado. So, now we had a Suburban – but for 18 people!
Then Sam got sick. The altitude hit him hard. He said he felt like a 300 pound elephant was sitting on his head. He stayed in bed for about three days. Then my eight year old, Jill got sick. She was standing in the kitchen and suddenly threw up everywhere. This would be the first of several vomiting episodes!
Things went well for the next few days. We had a blast skiing. My ten year old, Anna went to ski school, but I had Jill and 5 year old Jimmy hitting the blue runs by the second day! They were amazing. You can always tell when Jimmy is happy because he either sings, hums, or yodels (I don’t know, lol) – well, he yodeled all the way down the mountain. He had the people in the lift lines cracking up! Jill skied great, but she left her mark on the slope – half way down one run she lost her lunch – again! How do you clean up snow? I just left it, lol!
As the second day of skiing came to a close we pilled into Jen and Nicks Suburban. Okay – my sister and brother-in-law have a – um, low tolerance of children? Well, Jimmy suddenly had projectile vomiting all over the car. I thought both Jenni and Nick were gonna lose it! Seriously – am I on a reality show?
Wednesday morning we wake up to the most beautiful snowfall I’d ever seen. It just kept coming and coming. The news was predicting 2 feet. Jenni and Nick were set to fly out Wednesday afternoon from Denver, but the airport was closed and roads to Denver were being closed. The beautiful snow was proving a force to be reconned with. They decided to drive West and then South – a long way around to eventually arrive in Austin. They would put that rental car to more good use.
So, our transportation was now gone. So……my dad decided to put the snow chains on his truck and see if we could get to town and go ice skating. My father is a genius, well-educated – a wonderful man – but he is from Louisiana and has very little experience putting on snow chains, right? No matter – he puts them on and we head to town. We get down the driveway and hit the paved road. “I think we should take the chains off now,” says my step-mother. “Nah, then we’ll have to put them back on.” We drive about – oh 20 feet? and the noise is horrid! “Okay, lets take them off.” He puts on the hazard lights, as we are stopped in the middle of the road and we get out of the truck to take off the chains.
Too late, the chains were put on too loosely, and they are coming off anyway. Uh, oh – they are stuck on the axle. Its taking much longer than expected – and of course were of still in the middle of the road and the sun has now set. I stand behind the truck and wave my arms around so any oncoming vehicles don’t plow into us.
Uh, oh – the chain tore the break line. Crap! This isn’t good. The brake fluid is now visible on the ice. My dad starts cussing, my step-mom starts cussing. I want to run away but my kids are in the back of the vehicle! My sister somehow maintained a sense of humor because she jumped out and took a picture of the insanity! “It will be funny in a few months!”
So…..my dad’s truck gets towed! Now we have a minivan with questionable breaks and Allen’s jeep which holds 4 small people. So my dad goes to town the next day and rents a 4-wheel drive Tahoe. He is told that the truck won’t be fixed anytime soon – they have to order parts and the mail isn’t running and the roads are closed due to the storm. He’ll have to drive the rental truck back to Louisiana.
By this time Sam is feeling better and ready to have fun – but we are snowed in and you couldn’t even see the ski lifts, much less ski. We had to cancel our snowmobiling trip. The blizzard left about 3 feet of snow by Friday!
Well, Friday comes and we pack up and leave our home away from home. Mason and I were trying to scheme up ways to stay behind, but everyone else was ready to go. We got about 4 miles away from the cabin – and my dad’s 4-wheel drive rental truck gets stuck in the snow on the side of the road! What else can go wrong? With the help of a DOT employee we get him pulled back onto the highway and we are off again.
We make it back to Pueblo and Jimmy had to leave his mark in Colorado – more projectile vomiting! 20 more hours in the vomit smelling car! Yay me! Otherwise, the trip home went smoothly. We stopped in Amarillo and ate at the 72oz steak place. No one attempted to get the free meal. Good thing, or we might have had more vomiting!
So, we’ve been home a week now and my Dad’s truck is still in Colorado. He was going to fly out there and pick it up – but guess what – there is another blizzard coming! His friend owns a moving company, so he’s having them ship his truck back to him. I’m ready to go back to Colorado for more skiing – but – I’m still looking for the hidden cameras (and my $400)!!
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